Does Your Baby Frighten Easily?
How do we know when a baby is frightened? Often we don’t know why he’s crying or hysterical (as I’ve mentioned in previous blogs) because we’re trying to figure out if the baby has a full tummy or is still hungry. Maybe he has stomach pain from gas or he could be trying to have a bowel movement.
But sometimes we can see why he is frightened. He’s seen someone who is a stranger or something about a particular person has startled him and he just can’t stop crying. That’s difficult to explain to the person in question; especially if it’s an acquaintance, to say to them “My baby is scared of you!”
SO when your baby is frightened and starts breathing quickly, or takes shallow gulping breaths, rest your hand very lightly on her lower ribs.
Now, I want you to use your imagination to help her get rid of the fear and in turn calm her down. Keep your hand in place and imagine her fear leaving her.
You can picture the fear as something physical, like a shadow. Make that shadow smaller in your mind until it is insignificant. Like the little guy in the picture. Now imagine removing this tiny object, which was once “fear” but is now insignificant, out of the body. Replace the fear with calm using the same type of visualisation. Whatever calm, soothing vision you imagine, bring it into the body.
At this point one of 2 things will happen. The first is that you will feel a melding of your hands as they are resting on your baby. The second is the total opposite of the first, as you may feel the need to move one or both of your hands to different areas of her body, such as her sides or back, reaching the whole area of discomfort. Quietly wait with her as she relaxes into you.
Here are a few positions to help your baby calm down when he’s frightened :
Hold him gently but firmly. Your hands will naturally rest in the areas that need release. This will bring him calm and create a cycle of stillness and peace. He can be held with his chest to your chest or his back to your chest: whatever he prefers.
Chest to chest, one of your hands can rest gently on the side of his head. The second arm supports the baby and the hand is placed under his tailbone.
With his back to your chest, surround him with your arms, allowing your hands to naturally find the tense areas, which is usually near the pelvis or stomach area. The second hand is resting under the arm.
Hold your baby across your chest, or over your shoulder, one hand resting lightly on his lower back and the other hand very gently on his upper neck and head.
You can do the same hand placement if your baby is lying on his back. You slip your hands under his lower back and upper neck and wait for him to relax.
If you choose, you can take the hand from under the back and place it on the baby’s pelvis. This will also allow a lot of discomfort to be released.
As you get deeper into The Listening Touch, you learn how to calm your child by exploring with your hands, placing them where you feel your baby relax. The most sensitive and responsive areas are the lower back, neck, stomach, underarms, chest and cheekbone.
To learn more, watch the video Does Your Baby Frighten Easily?
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